I've been sexually attracted to my married friend for decades

My friend seduced me when she was 17 and I was 20. We never had sex after that although we asked and denied each other for being denied, it was stupid. My sexual attraction has only gotten more intense. She's married now and I'm divorced. I chose to leave her behind 10 years ago, I had a wife and it was good I didn't need a cock teaser friend. Last year she contacted me wanting to meet and talk. We met at a resturant and it was like old times all over again. I told her how I felt and how much I wanted sex with her. I said I know it's wrong asking you but you were a really sexual girl. Yea she said I was really bad and fucked lots of guys, but not anymore. She said I'd love to fuck you but I made a promise I would not cheat. Ok I said I can respect that, if you ever leave him or have a change of heart give me a call. Ok she said. Months go by she calls me again wants another lunch date. I meet her, I don't ask for sex but I wonder WTF does she want. I let her talk about this that and the other thing, I was losing interest in her fast. She knew I was hot and bothered by her, she said you never know what our future holds, ask me again someday. I'm thinking yea right like it would happen, I doubt it so I backed off for a year, I didn't call her and would not answer her calls. Last month she left me a text, she was angry I was pushing her away and said she wants to meet me for dinner. Well that dinner date is for tomorrow and I've had over a week to think about it. I remember when she seduced me, she put me in a bad situation with some of my friends, I never told anyone we had sex but she did and it cost me a good friend who was madly in love with her and ended our friendship because she had sex with me. I got over all of it except for a sexual desire for her that never went away, it was only surpressed. Now I'm going to see her tomorrow night and I figure I have nothing to lose, she said I should ask again, why else is she still coming to me right? I decided tomorrow night I'm going to ask her for sex. If I get no for an answer I'm finished with her and I'm going to tell her to go away and never contact me again. I know I'm wrong going after a married woman but this woman had few morals about it in her past, she had sex with several married guys in her past. I only asked her to have sex with me one more time and I'd never ask her again. Tomorrow is do, or it's going to end our friendship. I don't know why I'm still so sexually attracted to her, she was once a drop dead gorgous woman who gained a lot of weight and lost her good looks, I still want to have sex with her and I'm giving it one more try. If the answer is no then I'm telling her I can't see her anymore, that it's too fucking hard for me to see her and not have that intimacy I need so bad from her. The one thing I'm not getting is why she keeps coming back when she knows how bad I want her sex. She's never been an angel, she's cheated on her past boyfriends. Her appitite for sex was wild and crazy years ago. What do I have to loose, a friend that won't return the favor or help out a sexually in need friend. Tomorrow night the truth will come out, for me it's do or die.

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