58 Think I’m Bi curious now older

I’m a 58 years of age & have disorder to try gay sex .
I have only ever had sex with my wife, yes she took my virginity.
When I was younger I had a few homosexual experiences I guess you would say.
1: one friend would expose his penis to me & try to get me to touch it.
2: My friends older brother helped me when I got my tight foreskin stuck .
I e I went to visit my friend who was two years older than me & he informed me that you had to pull your foreskin back because as you got older it gets tight and could hurt.
At first I did not believe him, so he actually took his penis out & showed me how he pulled his foreskin back & told me if you did it for awhile it felt nice.
Being shy unlike him I went off to my friends bathroom to try.
Lo and behold my foreskin was tight and it took a while to roll it back. Sadly when it rolled all the way back it was that tight it hurt to try to roll it back over! I began to panic, it hurt & what would happen if my parents found out it was stuck back.
I began to cry & thought I’m going to be in big trouble.
Because I was so long in the bathroom my friend came and knocked on the door, asking if all was okay.I told him what happened & he began to panic too thinking he would get in trouble because he had told me to do it.
After a few panic stricken minutes both of us not knowing what to do he decided to call his older brother. I was super embarrassed but thought the trouble I would get in would be worse & the pain I was feeling I had to do something.
So his brother knocked the door & asked to come in the bathroom. Again my embarrassment grew ten fold , but my pain was growing too.
His older brother asked me what happened so told him how my foreskin was to tight and I was scared if my parents found out .
At first he asked me to try to roll it back over slowly, but I could not bring myself to do it because of the pain. He told me to try spitting on my hand and rub it on my penis.
I did that , but again was actually too scared to roll the foreskin back over because of the pain.
His brother then said he would help if I let him, I nodded with tears in my eyes & he actually spat directly on my penis a few times. Of course with hormones this caused my penis to swell more his brother then began to pull my foreskin back over slowly. Once my foreskin was back covering the head of my penis he asked if I was okay now, I told him yes & he told me I had to try to do it more often because it would get tight and hurt more if I didn’t as I grew older & my penis grew bigger . I told him I did not think I could do it because it hurt & I was still worried it would hurt. He asked if I trusted him , I said yes & he spat on my penis again several times & began to wank it back and forth slowly, spitting on it every now and then & building up speed, of course making feel nice. He asked if it was feeling nice after a while of pulling it back and forth and adding more lube with his spit. I told him it was beginning to & he stopped , smiled and said there you go.
That was like my second homosexual experience.
3: When I was 50 I decided to go to a heterosexual porn cinema, because I had never been to one. Needless to say I ended up being wanked there & also wanking the person who wanked me after he placed my hand onto his penis & told me. Go on you know you want to. Which I did. In fact I found the gentleman wanking around me & some doing more seemed to turn me on more than the heterosexual porn on the screen. ( and my confused mind was going your not straight, your bi you liked touching cock, & thinking about sucking it & maybe try it in your arse)
Needless to say I was embarrassed and felt guilty, I am married we have sex , my wife sometimes asked me to bugger her when she was on her period ( though I did not find it enjoyable myself)
Now of course because of my encounter, I began to watch porn first Trans porn so did not feel so guilty , but that turned to Trans porn where the trans was top , then that progressed to Bi porn , then full on Gay porn again I was more turned on thinking of sucking and being fucked .. & sometimes used my wife’s g spot vibrator to fuck myself while wanking to said gay porn.
I never thought about cheating on my wife & I did ask her once to stick her fingers in my butt , but she said no it was gay.
But now I’m thinking more and more about sucking and being fucked , I’ve even tried my own cum several times .
Should I try m2m sex , I mean I’ve only ever had sex with my wife .. but if she found out it would be divorce or just kill me I think .