Magical fingers

After a few drinks, I admitted this to my brother, and a few of my friends... and twenty something years on, they won’t let me shake the nickname!

So it was a weekend at our family home - my parents were away, my siblings out, and I was out with a new girlfriend, who had driven over for our first proper date and we had gone out for the evening.

She was supposed to be driving home, but she had a couple of drinks, and was quite pissed, so she asked if she could stay the night.

Clearly I wasn’t going to say no! She was a smiley 5’4” curly black haired ball of fun, with lovely round firm 34C/D breasts and a cute bum, and she was dressed in a short black skirt and tight red top, which I was hoping to help her out of!

So we got home and she was all over me as we got through the front door. Wonderful. We were kissing and our hands were exploring each other and we got as far as the stairs. I removed her panties and she was beautifully part shaven part trimmed, and I fingered her quickly into a screaming orgasm, which was just awesome, she was clinging onto me and biting me on the neck as she came, and it was really good, momentarily at least...

As she came, she was shuddering uncontrollably and screaming - it was super exciting and I was absolutely loving it - but unfortunately she also completely lost control of her bodily functions as she came, and she shat everywhere, all over the stairs.

I was utterly shocked. The smell was disgusting, and her shit was all over the carpet. I had never experienced anything like it and I never have done since.

And it was at that point her level of intoxication became more apparent, she appeared to be quite drunk. So I carried her to the bathroom trembling, showered her bottom half clean in the bath, still dressed, but with her little skirt up around her waist, and somehow I managed to keep her clothing quite dry. And then I put her to bed in the spare room, fully dressed apart from her panties (which had got involved in the mess on the stairs). She immediately crashed out, instantly falling into a deep, snoring, sleep.

I set to work on the stairs. It was awful. I cleaned it up the best I could. And then I went to bed to my own room.

In the morning, I slept in. And when I awoke, she was gone. I didn’t see her again.

The carpet was ruined and the smell wouldn’t go, it had to be replaced.

The cat got the blame.