Then and Now
It's funny how things can start out so innocently at a very early age. It began when I was six years old. I was flipping through the JC Penny catalog and stumbled onto women's bras. As I looked at the different pictures of breasts only covered by limited amount of cloth, without even realizing it, I had a fascination for breasts. I marked the pages for future reference. I don't know if anyone noticed, if the did, nothing was said. At eight I was in a liquor store with my parents. In a rack, completely accessible, not behind the counter. I don't know what all was there, but I noticed Playboy, with a sexy, but not completely revealing girl on the front cover. I looked at it and said to myself, I wish this magazine would show more inside. I looked through some pages and found some girls completely topless, some bottomless and some nude I couldn't believe my wishes had been answered. I had to hurry as to not be noticed, but I got an eyeful. Without realizing it, I had infatuation for breasts. At age eleven, I noticed a Playboy on my parents dresser when they were gone. I had an hour or two alone at home. I looked at the pictures without having to hurry. Now I looked at them in more detail.
It was then that I realized that my penis was stiff and pressing tightly against my pants. I had no clue what could be done with it in that condition, just that looking at the pictures had caused it. That night as I lay in bed the pictures I had seen earlier that day ran through my head. Again, my penis got hard, just from thinking about the pictures I seen earlier. I was in my pajamas and when I touched my boner on the outside of my PJ's, it jumped. I rubbed it a little more, it jumped again several times. I found it very intriguing, and a need for further investigation. I slid my hand down my pajama bottoms and rubbed my naked boner. At this point, I realized what I was doing felt kind of good. I continued to rub it, having no idea what I was doing, all the while it felt better and better. After what only must have been minutes, I had my first orgasm. I doubt I even ejaculated anything, but my boner was really jumping and it felt good. I remember afterwards for what seemed like a half hour, but probably only about ten minutes, my boner would continue to jump pretty regularly. I knew it felt pretty darn good as I lay there afterward in orgasmic bliss, but not knowing it.
I continued doing this from time to time. I only felt comfortable doing it when I was in bed at night. It felt good every time; I was hooked. I began jacking off most nights and I started to notice that it took longer and longer, for me to reach that happy zone. I accidently rubbed the head of my penis on the sheet covering me, and that felt really good. It was then that I began to get an idea of how to make what I was doing even better. Rubbing up and down the shaft, while also rubbing the head, it felt the best yet. It took some time to perfect what I was doing because at that point I had no guide at all. By the age of twelve my parents were divorced, I lived alone with my mom, and after school every day, I was home alone for about two hours before my mom would get home from work. I began masturbating after school, and in bed at night. I was getting pretty good at masturbating, still not knowing I was masturbating.