Shopping With MIL
I had offered to drive my fifty-six year old MIL to get her drivers license renewed. On our way back to her house she asked me to stop at a womens clothing store. It was the middle of the week, during the day, and almost no cars were in the parking lot. As we parked, she smiled and said, " Oh, good, Trina is here ! " I asked who Trina was. " She's a sweet little hommasexshul girl who works here. What do they call them ? Lisbons ? " she asked. I shook my head, saying, " No m'am, that's the capital of Portugal, they're called ' lesbians ', " I said, being really anal about such things. Knowing it would rankle me, she said, "Lisbonee-uns ". We went inside.
Indeed, little Trina, her black hair shorn close, no makeup, baggy jeans, sports shirt bearing the store's logo, and clunky black shoes sure looked the lesbian part, but, I tried not to stereotype. She smiled and raised her hand in greeting, saying, " Hey, Mrs. Mack, let me know if I can help you. We have some underwear on the bargain table, two for one. " " Mom " as I had been instructed to call her smiled and said, "Thankee" in her country drawl.
Mom, when she wasn't mispronouncing words, sometimes on purpose, just to piss me off, did another thing. She loved talking dirty, the dirtier the better, sounding more like a teenaged boy than a lady. She went straight to the bargain panties and bras, and began rifling through them. She threw a pair of fake silk bikinis at me saying, "Feel those. How would you like to rub your hard pecker against those ? " They did feel sexy. " You wear stuff like this ? " I asked her. " Shit no !" she laughed. " They would be crawling up my big ass all the damn time ! " She picked a pair of granny panties, nylon, in plain white, but, were see through in the rear. Then, she chose a bra, 42 DD, that was also see through. " You going to sex ol' Pop out, aren't you ? " I chided and she cut her watery blue eyes at me and growled, "That old coot don't care about me, long as he has those girlie magazines ! " She waved to Trina, " I'm going to try these on ! " Trina smiled and nodded. The rules for trying on panties was, you were supposed to try them on OVER your own. The rules for bras were more relaxed. I was instructed to hold her purse, and wait right outside the fitting room. I did as told. This was quite a few years ago, cameras weren't everywhere in those days. Trina kept stealing looks my way. Then I heard Mom say, " Come look at these. " I stepped into the cubicle, and there she was preening and posing. I tried not to ogle, but, failed. As she poked her massive chest out, I could plainly see her large red nipples, the blue veins, and stretch marks. She then, turned, and I could see every dimple in her ass, which wasn't all that big, and her ass crack. She had dispensed with the panty rule, she was bare under there. " What you think ? " she wondered, smiling coyly. "Ol' Pop will love them ! " I said, and she blanched again, "I ain't getting them for HIM ! " she spit and I was left to wonder, " Who then ? " She pushed me out, and called for Trina, who came running. I felt really out of place. Trina went in the cubicle, and I heard her say, " Yes, looks good, Mrs. Mack. I think you have the panties on backwards, though, and, your supposed to have on your panties under them..." I heard Mom chuckle, and then, she told me, " See if you like them this way, son, come in here !" and I went in and she had put on the panties backwards revealing her massive black bush. That sort of surprised me, I didn't know her red hair was from a bottle. I reddened and giggled like a teenaged boy. She looked at Trina who was checking her out, and quickly took off the bra and panties. The huge tits sagged but were still impressive. " Why don't you get lost, and tell anybody who comes in that Trina will be with them in a few minutes ? " she said, and waved me away. I went up to the register, but, could hear her moans and cries of passion, as they engaged in whatever they were doing. Thankfully, nobody came in. Trina emerged five minutes later, wiping her mouth. Then, Mom came out and had a little spring in her step, smiling broadly. She paid for the bra and panties, and slipped Trina two twenties, " For your services, " she cooed. Trina nodded and put the money into her jeans pocket.
When we got in the car, I asked her, " So, what did you and Trina get up to ? " At first she wouldn't tell me, but finally said, " She sucked my ol' titties and licked my pussy, and she sure does it better than the ol' coot ! " Then, she added, " I hope this will remain our little secret. " I shrugged and nodded and said, " No problem. " She smiled and told me, " I'm not a Lisbon, uhhh, lesbonin, I still love peckers ! " and laughed. I just drove, and entertained my own dirty thoughts.