Is this a healthy Dom Wife relationship?

My relationship with my wife started out very vanilla, but over the past 14 years has morphed into something else. I'm surprised to find that I'm mostly okay with it, but I sometimes wonder if it's healthy.

Here goes: We used to have regular sex, but now we have just one kind of sexual contact: my mouth and her vajajay. In the morning, we start our day with a little oral session, her on top. Sometimes she kneels on my hands. (She's gained about 40 pounds since we got married, so sometimes this feels a little uncomfortable.) This doesn't go on for too long, just 30 minutes or so. She usually climaxes once.

In the evenings, when we get home form work, I make dinner and we eat in front of the TV. At some point after dinner, she'll say, "All right, then." and start a movie. That's my cue to kneel in front of her and orally pleasure her. She stopped shaving her pubic hair about 6 years ago, so it is very thick now. Fortunately, her clitoris is quite large, so it's not hard to find, and her lips are quite pronounced. I'll dive in and do the best I can. It's my responsibility to go til the end of the movie, but I do get breaks, so it's not like it's a draconian system. However, a very long movie, like LOTR, can give me a back-ache.

My wife doesn't want my male sexual energy loose in the house, so I usually masturbate in the bathroom at work. I do this once or twice a week.

As I said, Ive been pretty okay with this, and have even learned to like some of it. (I've always liked cunnilingus, with both my previous GFs.) But there have been some new developments that I'm not sure about, in terms of how healthy our relationship is.

First, she got at mad at me one day for forgetting to pick up her dry cleaning, so she stopped showering for a week to "teach me a lesson." After about the third day, the smell of her urine-soaked pubic thatch was overwhelming, but I still had to do my morning and night duties. Fortunately, after my face has been in her crotch for about 20 minutes, I can no longer smell anything. But my nostrils do have a burning feeling. After a week, she did shower, but now she just showers about every 3 days, so her vaginal odor is very strong.

Second, she started taking videos of me performing oral on her and sending them to her sisters. I don't like that very much. I'm a little embarrassed by our relationship, and I cringe now when her sisters come over and joke about "taking a number" to get in on the "sucky fest." As a liberal man, I don't want to make any woman feel sexually uncomfortable, but I'm starting to feel a little uncomfortable myself!

Third, she stopped allowing me to wash my face before I go to work, so I have to go to my office with my face sticky. No one has said anything, but I'm concerned someone might smell her strong vaginal odors.

Do you think my wife is taking advantage of me? Do you think this is likely to continue getting more extreme? Do you think I should ask her to tone it down? Do you think I'm an idiot for staying with her?

Thanks a lot, everyone! As a longtime lurker, first-time poster, I've found this to be a great place to hear a variety of viewpoints.


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  • SHE has the pussy - SHE makes the rules. Worship HER -- submit to HER

  • I really do think it is about time she had you locked in a chastity cage, I am certain you both would love that, she could keep the keys and totally control you, why not bring the subject up ?

  • Man the fuck up.

  •'re her bitch now.

  • Nasty. Just plain nasty.

  • Do you enjoy it or not? If no, then it's not healthy. In true dom/sub relations the sub is actually the final arbiter and therefore in control. You need to have an open discussion with her about this.

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