So I'm a 27 married woman with a kid. I also feel like a sick human being. I'm part of an online fetish site. That's not what makes me sick. What makes me sick is that I literally can't get off without thinking about getting raped and creampied.
Through the online site I started chatting with a guy and we get pretty explicit. We started chatting about a year ago about my desires and constantly throwing around doing it in real life.
Well this weekend he's booked a motel near a porn theater with a "reputation." I've agreed to participate in rape play and forfeited my ability to renig my consent. After he rapes me for a couple of hours we're going to the porn theater so we can pick up some guys. I'm taking all of them bare with the intention of being filled with their loads.
I feel disgusting and at the same time so ready for the entire scenario. Am I awful? I don't know.