Fixated

I'm doing my best I can through therapy, but I'm just too fixated on him to break this relationship. My first time was with him, and it was wrong from the beginning but we liked it so much we kept having sex for many years afterwards.
My brother and I have been lovers since I lost my virginity to him at 14. He was 16. It was only messing around at first, but hooking up was just so easy, and we got so good together, we just kept going. Sex was just a door away, and it was the perfect training. He became the first man to ever make me cum... and the problem is, he's been the only one ever since.
Maybe it's just the taboo that makes it so good, the point is I've never felt the same lust for any other man. And believe me, I've tried. We date other people freely, have sex freely, but it disturbs me that there's seemingly no other man on this planet I'd like to fuck. I know it's wrong, but one part of me doesn't want to stop. Feeling him cum inside of me, hear him orgasm while he enjoys my body... it's a totally different experience, and I hate knowing that the healthy thing is to stop, watch him settle down with another woman in the future, while I'm supposed to do the same. I wouldn't be happy.

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  • I to am with my brother far more than my XBF. He is almost two years older than I am and he took my cherry when I was 14 and for the past two years being we moved out of state going to college we share an apartment and we live as husband and wife and no one knows any different.

    All the time we were in High School we both told the other we should be dating others but to come right down to it I didn't want any other boy and he didn't want to be with any other girl other than me so we behaved ourselves in front of our parents but as soon as they went to bed he'd come to my room and spend the night with me.

    I love my brother dearly and he loves me just as much and I don't think we'll ever part.

  • Brilliant!! I am serious. The foundation of your love was already [and permanently] in place. There is no reason you two should part when you can focus on building your relationship to a stronger level. This is all positive when one just leaves society & psychology out of it. So simple & so beautiful!!

  • Well I guess you better make your move then, and intend to make peace with it if he's not in it...

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