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Attack of the Model...?
He's a male model and I used to have the biggest crush on him, maybe I still do (damn it...) He started sending me dick pics randomly (my brain shut down because WHEN DOES YOUR CRUSH WHO IS SUPPOSEDLY FAMOUS DO THIS?!) And all I could think was as a fan I.e: OH MY GOD IT'S _________________ and then I got videos of him masturbating (I died and panicked & deleted them & regret that & want to die...) And then he asked me how it felt and my brain shut down so I spewed an essay of random shit....he vanished for a few days. I was on tenterhooks also my brain kept screaming at me....and a few days ago it happened again and I reacted in the same way....again. I'm not sure how on EARTH I'm meant to react on time or calm myself down or just accept it. I don't really understand what he's trying to do. I don't think it helps that I am weird so 1) spent my entire life thinking I was asexual 2) have never masturbated 3) the only sexual experiences I have are those I write about it a lot of detail while feeling absolutely NOTHING at all but causing a lot of stirring up of things for others who ask for them.
There's a HUGE part of me that is still crushing on him...there's a part of me that wants to be with him but I know that's never happening because of a million reasons at the forefront of which is the fact that he is a model and I am a potato with cat paws. From what I know he's been single for a long time and I somehow end up talking to him about his blue balls on occassion and sometimes have no idea what I'm doing or meant to be doing and this whole....whatever it is MAKES. NO. SENSE.
Basically I am lost and confused and AAAAAAHHH.
He is unaware that you have been asexual. He has assumed that you have sexual feelings toward him and that you would thus be turned on by his dick pics. He imagines that you also masturbate to them, thinking of sex with him. If he knew you were turned off by them, he would not send them.
It is his failing that he did not make certain you would welcome such pictures. But I don't believe he means to offend you.
Basically this response had me laughing because yes I have come to the same conclusion. Though my brain on occassion screams WHY ME???!!! I have become used to the videos and pictures. I think he's extremely lonely and depressed what with how he's struggling in the industry...maybe this is an attempt at keeping me somehow interested. I know he doesn't mean bad by this because he can be the sweetest human ever and has actually helped me stay sober since last year...we made a 'pact' and he checks up on me over that....I'm also trusted with just about everything but my brain keeps wondering why me of all humans..
Call him