Rpressed memory
Iam a 20 yrs old male and a virgin when I think back to my childhood I remember a certain event that happened to me when I was between the ages of 6-8 not sure what age exactly. But I only remember this when I really think back. I lived in a big apartment with my parents and two sisters and our next door neighbour there was this older girl probably 16 yrs or older who use to babysit me and my sisters. I remember I was over at the neighbours one day being babysat by the girl just the two of us and all I can really remember it that she took my hand and asked me to stroke her down there. I remember the feeling of hair when I first put my hand down in her pants or skirt (not sure) then a wet sensation when I put my fingers in her hole. I never saw it I just remember her having fingered her. Hell I don't even remember what she lookes like all I really remember is the sensation of a wet vagina and I really couldn't make sense of what happened. It wasn't much later in life that I remembered what had happened when I could sort of make sense of it all. Till this day I have not been with another girl or even kissed one for that matter. I wonder If what happened affected me at all. and no I have never told anybody about this it happened in a different country before my family moved to Canada when I was 9.
My baby sitter played with me when I was 8. It was wonderful and it is a cherished memory. She was sixteen and beautiful.
Try to forget it and since you have grown by now, get a real pussy to enjoy with! This is what really matter. In me baby years (3 or 4) my babysitting girl aged 22 or so would feed me her tits till I went to sleep! I almost forgot the event in later years!
I think it has affected you, perhaps more deeply than you think. That it should surface after this amount of time is one sign of a repressed desire. If the memory of feeling a girl's pussy and her wet vagina makes you feel at all aroused you need to explore those feelings with a female friend. It sounds like you want to, but are repressing it.
If your problem is getting girls, go check pick up artist stuff ing oogle. mystery was 21y old virgin when he started going out alone at night, now he's been called the best pick up artist int he world. If your problem is getting girls, worked for me ;)