Discovered i might be into knifeplay/bdsm
Discovered i might be into knifeplay/bdsm in a really embarrassing way
on a random evening i was trying to see if i could use an old knife to cut myself (as one does). it didn’t go as expected when i tried doing it on my forearm and my legs (the usual places) so i thought the knife might not have been sharp enough. i tried using it across my neck (which i usually don’t do) because i thought the neck would be easier to cut, and it still didn’t work. some time later i remembered this happened and i tried cutting my neck again just for fun and i feel like i was weirdly into it, and it felt really good.
i’ve also tried choking myself by fastening a belt around my neck and i feel like that also was kind of weirdly good.
i don’t know what to do with this information. there is nobody in my life that i want to talk to about this because i’m so embarrassed. i’m not with anyone currently and i’m not sure if i’m really up for dating or hookups at the moment, so there’s not much i can do to test things out, so to speak. i also probably wouldn’t try this out anyways at the current moment, i feel like i should be a little bit less insane before i try anything. i just needed to get it off my chest because it makes me feel really weird and crazy.
important to note: i do not encourage or wish harm on anyone. please do not do what i did as it is probably not safe. i am an adult and i was not coerced into this by another person, nor was i under the influence of drugs or alcohol. i am aware i have mental health problems and i am seeing a doctor, if you are worried about your mental health i encourage you to talk to someone as well.
thank you for reading!
I have a penis
Girls like the penis
The male dick goes into the female cunt
I commend you for seeking help from a doctor; that's really commendable. However, it's important to recognise that feelings of self-hatred or self-harm are serious issues. This is a mental health challenge, and it's okay to seek support. It's also not advisable to isolate yourself during this time.
I'm here to help you as well.