I want to cheat on my long distance girlfriend

We dated for 6 months, I can say shes the first girl I ever truly loved. But theres been a lot I feel like I miss out on. To her our sex life was amazing. I made her feel like no one else and gave her the best orgasm she ever had literally on the very first night. I'll do anything to please her and she's addicted to the sex with me. But this didn't go both ways because she never pushed herself to please me so wouldn't suck me off for any more than like 30 seconds. She was so slow when jacking me off that she couldn't make me cum. I could orgasm if she kept sucking but she refused to since she doesn't like cum in her mouth, but she told me how she swallow her ex almost every time they had sex and idk why she said that to me because she refuses to when it comes to me. She won't deepthroat or even try just because she doesn't want to. Now me and her are long-distance for a while and I want to cheat so badly. I know a girl who I know swallows and can deepthroat and she's even said she'll suck me off. Its so tempting and getting worse day by day. All it takes is a single call and I could have sex with at least 3 different people off the top of my head. But I still have a girlfriend, but a girlfriend who has set so many limits on my pleasure but no limits on her own pleasure. I just want to feel as good as I made her but that was never something she cared about. Now I have the ability to feel that good but I want it to be her to please me but I know that can't happen or ever will happen unless I talk to her. But her mental health is so bad if I talk to her about this, which I tried before, she'll just try to kill herself or hurt herself and it isn't worth. I'm so tired of suffering in quiet and I can't talk about this without feeling like the bad guy.

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