I'm seeing black men on the side now for last year. My first was a guy from work, he was a young guy working in our shipping receiving dept, i work in accounting. We had sex at work a number of times, then in our cars. He had a girlfriend and i'm married so going to our homes was not possible. I've been married now for 12 years, ups and downs, more downs. I have two young daughters that i adore and do NOT want to lose them. The young man from work doesn't work here anymore but i still stay in contact. I use tinder to meet other black guys, and it at times gets out of hand and need to chill. I do not want to be divorced, but mostly don't want to lose my children. I'm not all that attracted to my husband sexually, but love sex. This is crazy.