Need help with wife and our sexual relations.
My wife and I love each other a lot. But I have a pretty small penis. It's not quite 4 inches. Maybe 3.75 inches and about 4 inches in circumference. Anyway I thought things were ok sexually. Then she confessed to me that she fakes orgasms and I have never given her one. Then I found out she had an affair with an old lover about a year ago and it lasted about 6 months. I suspect it was longer than that. I was pretty devastated at first but I kind of have been turned on and aroused by the thought of my sexy sweet wife fucking another man.
I asked her many questions about all the details of their affair. The nitty gritty. She said she wouldn't lie. She really enjoyed the sex. The first time they did it he pulled out cause they hadn't talked about it. She said after that he ejaculated inside of her and she is on the pill. So she would make love to me in the morning then get a bath and by 1 pm that day she was having relations with him. I asked if she performed oral sex on him and she said no. They just fuck. I got her to admit it's more than just sex. She still has feelings for him. I asked if he gives her an orgasm and she said yes.
I asked her if she wants to divorce me and marry him. She said no as he is also married and they don't want to marry. She told me that they are no longer meeting and broke it off. But I wonder if she is just saying that. I asked her if she wanted a threesome to which she said no. She only wants one man at a time. At least she didn't stop having sex with me like many women do when they take a lover. But I can't help but think about them together making love. My wife the love of my life with another man. I feel like less of a man now. I couldn't satisfy her the way she needs. I try everything including going down on her but she says she doesn't really like that anyway. She just wants straight sex no oral or anal.
I asked if she thought about me when she was with him. She said no not at all. I guess why would she. I'm better looking than him. He's taller and well has the larger penis. I'm so confused now. Part of me is turned on and the other part of me is very hurt and mistrustful of her now. When I'm at work I wonder what she is doing and who she is with. She is currently a fulltime student going to school. I told her that I have been thinking of her with other men and that I get aroused by it. She said she just wants me. Not sure about anything now.