Improper cravings

The context: I've been married 10 years, my husband and I are both 30. We were high school sweethearts. Our relationship is pretty good, but boring. When we were in our teens and early 20's, we talked a lot, had sex a lot, and things were good. After a decade of marriage, well, things are kinda "blah." We still love each other though. He only wants sex maybe once a week at most, and it's still pretty good when we have it, but I'm craving a lot more both emotionally and physically.

The emotional: I have a pretty major crush on a guy at work. We're friends and go out to lunch and have drinks after work frequently. His mind is amazing, and we share far more interests than I share with my husband. That's hot, imo. Intellect is sexy. I love talking to him; I feel whole around him. He's also quite handsome. We've never done anything physically improper, not even a kiss, as we're both married, but I know he's attracted to me too. The only bad thing we've done is talk about sex a lot. Some of our conversations about sex have been downright filthy in detail. That's bad, I know.

The biological: there is also the issue of my own biology. For whatever reason, when I turned 28 or thereabouts my sex drive went crazy high. It was never like this when I was younger. I've always liked sex, but in the last couple of years I want it all of the time. I'm always feeling randy and ready to fuck at any time. I can't even be near a random guy on the bus and smell his cologne without my nipples hardening and getting as wet as a rain forest. There is also my work friend: oh, I'd love to fuck him, no doubt. I would love call in sick to work, meet up with him at a hotel, and fuck each other silly for 8 hours, until we have to go back home. I think about that a lot.

The issue of scruples: I can feel myself twirling uncontrollably towards having an affair. The dynamics are just right. It's a perfect storm. Emotionally and physically, I want sex with a man who is not my husband. I've never been with another guy, and feel like I missed out or something when I was younger. I'm trying to get over it and keep my scruples. I think maybe I need marriage counseling or something, but my marriage isn't bad. I just want more. Something different, hot and exciting. Something naughty. I don't think counseling can give me that.

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  • You need to find religion, sweetie.

  • You sound exactly like my wife. Everything sounds the same. She wonderful, attractive and our sex drive has just completely stopped. She works for the same company I work for I just work out in the field. About the 3rd month I had just given up. I knew about her male friend (Blake) who she was walking around with every morning for coffee and then lunch. Friends of mind at the office started making comments about how they were spending so much time together. I’m unsure what her immediate coworkers thought as I never had any opportunity to visit them or go my wife’s desk. I casually approached my wife and questioned her which she denied any fling.I was almost sure this is where everything was leading to but I couldn’t prove anything. The hardest part was knowing she was flying to Chicago to a 5 day conference and he was going. I heard little from her and I think it was her perfect opportunity to make it all happen between them both. It was the hardest time in my life. I’m sure something happened between them, even though I treated her like a queen and I can honestly say that. Here’s my take... you feel like a total different person and you shine around another cute hot male.
    It happens every day at every workforce whether it’s in an office or school. Your urges will overwhelm you and your going to be with him. It won’t bother you if you do it just like it didn’t bother her. You’ve already made the excuses why it felt right
    You’ll keep looking at reasons why you should than rather why you shouldn’t

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