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Advice please
So here's the situation. I'm a 23 y/o man, I've been sleeping with a 20 y/o woman and we are basically a couple at this point, I love her very much. Problem is she is sexually a masochist and she has severe self esteem and emotional problems outside of the bedroom, she's attempted suicide once before. Would it be smarter for me to completely try to cut off being dominant and abusive during sex? I feel like she doesn't understand the line between being treated like that as a fetish and in real life, I really don't want to carry over and cause her harm to her in her day to day life, but I also want to be able to please her sexually in that respect. What would you do?
The problem is you're only playing at being dominant. She needs a real, 24/7 dom to manage her properly. As long as you keep thinking what she wants and needs is a part time fetish limited to the bedroom she's never going to stabilize and become what she needs to be.
She sounds like she needs training. You are too young. Get her a Daddy.
Sounds like you care about her, which is good. Have you talked to her about this? I would try to talk about how playtime in the sack is fantasy and all good, but that it is just that.
Like how a lot of women have rape fantasies, but real life rape is violent and not arousing or pleasant. Consensual pretend rape games can be satisfying and a turn on for them, but not in real life.
And tell her you care about her and don't want to see the stuff in the bedroom spill over into the rest of her life.
If you think it is really unhealthy you should get her to go to counseling with you.
I would talk to her about it. I also hope she is in some form of counselling?
Get out while you can. You are still young
Get away from her.. I've dated the mentally unstable (too many times), and even if the sexy is amazing..It's not worth it. They'll eventually use the sex as an excuse for their erratic craziness.. Had one tell me I "ruined her life" and was so upset that she wanted to quit her job.. All because of me.