How do I make it clear?

I am a married man of 10-ish years. I am married to a loving, beautiful woman that pleases me emotionally but not physically. This last year we had an au pair, latina, young, beautiful, and a virgin.

As gorgeous as she was, I didn't want to be her first and never flirted with her even though I wanted her in the worst way. I have stayed in contact with her even though she moved back home. I hadn't given it much thought but my wife said, "if something happened to me, you would totally date her."

I was a bit suprised but truthfully, I would. I miss seeing her every day. I miss her smile and her laugh. I miss her accent and her messed up English. So here's the question...

Should I tell her how I feel? If I should, HOW do I tell her in such a way that anyone that sees our communication wouldn't read it that way?

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