I lust for someone...

I am 41 now, but I was a virgin until I was 27. I didn't have many girlfriends, I was overweight, but a nice guy. Usually I ended up in the friend zone pretty quickly. But I had one girlfriend in particular whom I still lust for... I was 21 at the time, and she had just turned 18. We dated for about 4 or 5 months. During that time, she offered herself to me sexually. But she had been molested by her father. And between my "nice guy" instinct kicking in and my shyness/self-consciousness about my weight I could never take advantage of her. I think I loved her and lusted after her more than any woman I have ever met. I still think about her every day. Sometimes I think my life would have been so much better if I had just fucked her. Maybe she wouldn't have broken up with me. Maybe I would have had more confidence to date and have sex with other women. By the way, I am married, but she is the only woman I have had sex with. I do love her, but not on the same level as this woman I dated. It has been almost 20 years, and I still think about this girlfriend every day.

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