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Sex abuse
So… I just want to confess something: I did not talk with anyone this subject, and for obvious reasons. I want to talk about so named child abuse or pedophilia, I think this practice was widespread in the past, and also today there are a lot of people that will do this if the low was not so hard. When I was 7 year old I was abused a few times by a boy that was 17 years old, actually he did not forced me physically but he persuade me to suck his dick, by offering me some toys and gadgets that he has, I was living with my grandmother and we were poor, and she could not afford to buy me toys, The fucked think is not the physical action, because today I am very open minded about sexuality and I had also sex with man and actually I enjoy it , the fucked situation is psychologically, and this will hit you back after years, because then you will realize that you were fooled, and someone took advantage of your stupidity and naivety, I was ashamed about that moment, and mostly about me, that I was so stupid to do this… but I was just 7 years old, I am a nice guy and I do not want to harm anyone, but I am sure that many will not have a problem to abuse a child, I think this is the reality, also at that time 2 of my friend that were 7, and 8 years old were also abused by this boy, and also by another one that was 19 at that time. My grandmother and his mother were friends, and sometimes they visit each other. I think that the human instinct is to take advantage of our fellows if they are week, but maybe we should have also some empathy and not fuck someone live just because we can, and they cannot defend themselves.
I was in Amsterdam in the early seventies. I saw what was like a newspaper for peodophiles and there was very young boys and girls features in it, mostly girls from Thailand. I was 14 at the time and it shocked me.
My first sexual encounter was at the age of 11. It was with my friend's older sister (age16). He was called away by his mom and she came in with a hole in the crotch of her panties. She showed it to me and convinced me to put my finger in there. Then she asked me to lick it. I licked her pussy till she came. I don't feel I was taken advantage of. In fact I consider myself very lucky to have had the experience. I only wish I could have done it several times and maybe fucked her too. Not everybody feels taken adavantage of by this.