Bad swap
For 6 years now my husband has suggested that we try swinging, and for the longest time I thought it would be a disaster, and it's now been confirmed.
I finally said yes, I'll try it, and he went and found a couple into it from social media. I'm 30, my husband is 35, and the couple he found were in their early 20s. They weren't married, but boyfriend and girlfriend, and they said they had experience swinging, whereas we didn't. We met at a bar, and they were nice, but the vibe was a little odd, because we knew we might be fucking later, as that's the reason for the meetup. I didn't feel comfortable having strangers in our house, so we rented a hotel room. They split the cost.
We got to the hotel and it was a little odd. I thought the other guy was attractive, maybe a 7 on a 10 scale, but he wasn't really that bright mentally. It took some work to get into the vibe. I'm no hottie, probably a "6" in terms of looks, pretty plain and a bit heavy. I have tits and plenty of ass. My husband is quite attractive, probably an "8" by anyone's standards. The guy's girlfriend was a very attractive blonde, I'd say a "9." She had really small tits, almost flat chested, but her face was beautiful, as was her bubble ass and hourglass figure. I could feel my husband lusting for her all night.
Well, we undressed and I started making out with the other guy, and he was average at best. Seriously, my husband is so much better. So were guys that I dated before him. I was polite and really tried to enjoy him, but it was really bad.
Meanwhile I'm watching my husband fuck his girl. They were going at it like it was a sport, and it bothered me that she was so turned on. Her nipples were totally erect, her body flushed when she came, and her mouth was filthy. She fucked the hell out of my husband, and I couldn't really deal with it. The worst part of it was seeing how much my husband enjoyed it, as he came in her pussy 3 times in an hour. He has never had that kind of energy since we started dating and then married a decade ago.
On the way home my husband was talking about how great it was and how we need to meet up with them again, but I said it was the worst sex I've ever had in my life and we're not doing that again. I'm done with this. The big problem now is that my husband is addicted to this whole idea of swinging.
I know just how you feel. We went down the same path and met with 6 or 7 couples in the first year or so and it was the same every time. We would be doing fine until the sex started but the sight and sounds of my husband enjoying another woman always turned me off, no matter how keen I was for the other man. We tried separate rooms but it didn't help and I couldn't do it any more so we stopped.
A year later he pushed me into meeting other men on my own from hookup sites, so I tried that and it works much better for us both, as he gets as excited as me when I go out for a fuck and when I come back home happy and used.
My first wife and I often indulged in pleasures of the flesh, swapping, 3-somes, orgies, swinger parties, you name it we tried it. One thing we always kept as a rule was, if one of us didn't care for the sex, then we didn't fuck that person or persons again.
Many problems here. You had a bad attitude going into it ("disaster"), and then you did it anyway. Even swingers have bad sex with people they meet. It's not like you will be guaranteed to have the time of your life. Sometimes it sucks, or isn't as good as your partner. You also seem to have jealousy issues because your husband had a good time. Roll the fuck away from this shit and look at yourself.
Start afresh searching for the ideal pair to swing with
If your husband wants to continue fucking the girl just let it be
Once the lid is off the cookie jar....
You make too many comparisons. For all the guys know, maybe you were not such a hot screw either.
Get rid of the loser guy and have a threesome with your husband and the girl.
Then when she is comfortable with the two of you find a much better guy and make it a foursome. Kind of mean to the original guy but when there is no chemistry.....just too bad.