Confused and Conflicted
Where to begin? I suppose I should begin by saying I'm gay and I've been with my boyfriend for four years. I absolutely love him from the bottom of my heart, and I consider him to be the only one I'll ever need.
But at the same time, I've always been somewhat of an exhibitionist and sexually curious. For a while, I've had the strong desire to share myself online with others and have others share their bodies with me. The sexual thrill of knowing somebody is anonymously getting off to me is very enticing. Now, I haven't actually done this as I feel terrible just thinking about it and feel as if I would be cheating on my boyfriend and ruining the one thing I consider sacred in my life. I'm at a loss for what to do. I'd never hurt him and I have no desire to hurt him...
OP Here,
I have decided to not follow these actions. I will play out these fantasies with my boyfriend. Performing these idle fantasies and the small bit of pleasure I receive from them is not worth the crippling disgust and regret that come along with it. If anybody is on this site, wondering whether or not they should do something that will harm the one they love, don't. It is never worth it.
I am going to leave this behind me and simply do exhibitionist related things with my boyfriend. Hopefully I'll never have to return to this site.
Looking and touching are tow different things. I am married and I look at women, nice asses.But I don't touch! I always say, " I am married, not blind" So go for it and have fun!!