Slipped

I was visiting a friend and she was getting her kitchen remodeled. We hung out and chatted and watched the two guys work. They were younger, maybe mid 20s (we are in our 40s). My friend made a comment that they looked hot, and it didn't occur to me to think of them that way, but actually she was right.

My friend is a bit of a slut, always has been, and she said to me, "I bet they'd fuck if we asked." It was then that I knew the bloody mary that she was drinking was getting to her head. I told her to get a grip. After all, my friend knows that I'm a member of Sex Addicts Anonymous (SAA) and that I've had my share of troubles that damn near cost me my marriage to my husband. I'd been sober for four years.

When the guys went on break my friend went over and she unzipped her jeans. I was mortified. I didn't hear what she said to them, but their eyes lit up. She took off her pants and their hands were all over her immediately.

It was a really bad trigger for me. Seeing her suck cock and how hot the guys looked in the process was sensory overload. My heart was beating out of my chest and my adrenaline was pumping. Watching them turned me on like a faucet.

It was fucking horrible, but I got up, took off my leggings, and joined them. It was pure animal instinct. We had a foursome right there on the floor and fucked both guys. They really liked pussy, which made for awesome sex. We got pounded hard and creamed and had multiple orgasms in the process. I hadn't felt that satisfied in years.

As I lay on the floor exhausted, the guilt washed over me like a tidal wave. That was a massive slip up. I should not have done it. The acting out was shameful, but the sex was so fucking good. I felt like I was back where I used to be, when I'd be craving and acting out for a fuck with almost anyone.

I called my SAA sponsor that night and talked through my negative emotions. It was a bad moment, but there was nothing really to do but get back on the wagon. The memory of the sex will forever be intoxicating, and I just have to deal with that.

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