Butter face

I was married finally in September. I feel like I've lied to my husband because I feel not telling the whole truth is the same as lying. All my life boys and men called me butterface and I have been in many sexual situations that involved more then two men at a time. I'm just afraid of what he may say.

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  • Here is my two cents, take it for what its worth. If you live in the same town as people you have done these things with and there is a chance someone might say something to your husband then it would be a great idea to be honest and just come clean . Let him know you had a very active sex life before the two of you met, you don't have to go into all the dirty details . Just reassure him that he is the only man you want and love and the past is the past. The worst thing to do is not say anything then have him start hearing from other people how many men you fucked before him . It will plant the seed that you are still hiding something and he can't trust you.You never know he may be asking these questions because the thought of you getting fucked by other men or groups of men turns him on.

  • Thanks I've decided to come clean the next time he asks I will truthfully answer any question he has

  • He doesn't need to know.

  • May I ask what are some of the things you've done . Anal,dp,gangbang etc ?

  • Yes to all that

  • My old lady and I have a "don't ask, don't tell" agreement. I'm sure we have both done things that we may not want the other to know about. It's what her and I do together that's important now, not what we have done in the past.

  • I am trying to get there by avoiding his questions, it's not like he quizzes me every day or anything just once in a while.

  • Honey, I spent 8-years in the Navy, traveled all over the world, and fucked more men, women, couples, and groups that I could ever count. When I got out I went to college and got my masters degree in engineering. When I got married last year my fiance and I agreed we would leave the past the past. My number is well over 100 and his is somewhere around 15 and there's no need for me to rub his face in any of it anymore than I want to know who he shagged, what she looked like, how she was in bed, etc. As long as he doesn't have any baby moma drama out there I'm good.

  • Thanks

  • I agree with the first person who responded. What you did before you were with your husband isn't something he needs to know about. It's none of his business. I've never asked any of my girlfriends about their sexual history. He cares about you, not what you've done or haven't done.

  • Ty guy's it's just bugging me that's all

  • Test the water first with stories of others or/and fantasies, i did and learned that my partner doesnt like the thought me being or had been with more than one guy at once, so i never told him

  • You do know butterface means "everything looks good BUT HER FACE" right?

    Those boys/men had no right to say that to you. It's a terrible thing to say to a woman. I mean, they are entitled to their opinion, but they certainly should not have let you know that's what they call you. I am sorry that has happened to you. On the flip side, your husband clearly found you attractive enough to marry, so please let those mean comments go. Don't tell your husband people called you that. If he loves you (and I assume he does) he won't want to hear terrible things people said to you.

    My personal opinion is you have not lied, not even by omission. Your sex life before him is your business, not his. If he was concerned he would have asked you about it before marriage. In fact, some men would quite love that you were/are adventurous.

    I would just keep these things to myself, personally. Just move forward with your husband. You deserve to be happily married. Leave your past alone, and live your life.

  • The problem for me is lately he's been asking if I have ever done certain things. I didn't answer truthfully

  • Are you comfortable enough to say "Honey, remember when you asked me if I did XYZ, I wasn't totally honest. I thought you might think less of me. I have tried XYZ." I don't really feel you must confess, but if you can't live with it I suppose you better.

    BUT I really would hate to think you could mess up a good thing, when you've really done nothing wrong.

  • I don't think he will want to be with me if he finds out everything. I don't know how to tell him yes I've done those things.

  • Please don't. Let the past live in the past and enjoy your marriage. If a lie or omission could cause detriment to someone then you have an obligation to confess, but this "lie" or omission won't cause him any detriment. You don't need to confess.

  • I'm so nervous

  • Big hugs. I can't tell you what to do (and I am a stranger on the internet anyway) but if you were one of my best friends I would tell you not to tell. <3

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