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Retired and quit grooming
I just retired at age 66 a couple of weeks ago and I've been lazy as fuck.
In the last two weeks, I have:
* changed my clothes once. I've quit wearing underwear.
* brushed my teeth three times, but only when they felt really "furry."
* not left the house. I get food delivery from Walmart.
* not taken a shower.
My BO is pretty bad, but I expected it to be worse. My ass crack is pretty greasy and about a week ago it started smelling like burnt motor oil. That was a new smell to me, but I've gotten used to it.
My water bill should be pretty low next month.
You should run for president
If Trump can be elected, you'd be an improvement
I guy or girl
...and you are telling us this, why?
Are you my uncle Joe?
And you should be dead soon.