Funny Confessions

1000 stroke challenge

So my husband and I recently changed from using condoms to the pill and he hasn't taken to the change well. It turned out he was using climax controlled condoms. So I have him taking the 1000 stroke challenge to increase his stamina. On the first day he had to stroke his cock 100 times without coming then 200 times on the second day and so. He... (more)

Fed Ex guy just saw my dick

I was working out in the garage naked as always. I heard this truck pull up in front, so I thought I would check it out and see. I am expecting packages, but most of them come from the Post Office. I looked out the window and saw a Fed Ex guy start to leave with his package. I opened the door a bit and called out to him that I was here. He... (more)

In the act ;)

I was caught masturbating by my older brother. The thing i can't get out of my head is his face! It was too priceless! lmfao

My Sister Learns About The Birds and the Bees

Today my parents told my 9 year old sister about the birds and the bees, after she asked what the word 'sex' meant. Her reaction was too funny! And she had genuine questions about it. She asked stuff like if the tampon went in the butt, if she would get pregnant if she touched the sperm, or if babies could only be made while the couple were in... (more)

OMG!

I walked in on my dad watching porn! He wasn't masturbating, but his reaction to me being there was too damn funny! lmfao

Dildos and lots of them!

Awhile ago my mate ask me to help him move some furniture at his mums house, she was having a new carpet fitted in her bedroom.
My mate was running late so I started to take the draws out of the big chest of drawers to lighten the weight, his mum was telling me where to put them, as I took the third draw down she said "oh that one you can just... (more)

My best friends drunken girlfriend

A few years back I was out with my best friend and his girlfriend. They were in town from Florida and staying at my place. We had gone to a local bar and his girlfriend got very drunk and embarrassing. We managed to get her home but my buddy was super pissed at her and wanted nothing to do with her that night. He went to sleep on the couch... (more)

Wong Ho

30 years ago, when I was in the US Navy, me and some buddies were partying in a bar in Subic Bay, Phillipines. My buddy, Bob, had just came back downstairs after fucking one of the bar girls. He sat down at the table with a funny look on his face, so I asked him what was up. "What the hell does Wong Ho mean" he asked. I said "Wong Ho?, never... (more)

Dental assistant

My dentist's assistant isn't the most attractive, but I still appreciated the feel of her boob on my forehead as she worked on my teeth today.

Listening to the Ladies Room

My office is right next to the women's bathroom at work. Up until a few years ago, there was only one bathroom at work. As more women started working there, the company put in another one. There was one big office next to the men's room, and they walled half of it off to be the ladies room. The remaining half is my office. However, they did a bit... (more)

My lil sister found my "shaking" vibrator

So a couple days ago, I left my little bullet vibrator in the bathroom by mistake.
I went to go retrieve it this evening, and it wasn't there. Naturally, I immediately assumed my disabled little sister must have taken it by accident, nit knowing whwt it was. She was out, so I carefully searched her room and the bathroom, to no avail.
When... (more)

Even women have that weak spot.....

I have done something terrible. If you get the title then you know I pretty much ran my crotch in to a table, being a woman, I thought it wouldn't hurt. Then I sat down....

Cock whore AND cumslut

I have a growing reputation for my insatiable craving to suck cocks, as much as possible. This reputation got my an invite to a kink party in New York over this past weekend. It was a kinky Valentine party and most people were in some form of costume. My friend Sara was willing to go with me, even though S&M is not really her scene. On Sara's... (more)

Ruffles the French Maid takes a pie

Hi all, this is Barry again. Some of you have read some of previous confessions about my addiction to sucking other guys' cocks. Well, this confession includes some blowjob action, but isn't really about that. There is a couple that I get together with periodically to "play" with. I suck the guy off, the girl spanks me while doing it, etc. We... (more)

Caught in the bathroom

My sisters and I were all visiting my parents for the weekend. I brought my husband, one sister is single and the other has a boyfriend. My old room and my sisters (the one with the bf) share a bathroom that you can get into from both sides. After we went to bed my hubby and I started to fool around and when it got quiet we could hear my sister... (more)

Baby at an early age

I am a male and when I was really, really, really young I had a girlfriend who introduced me to sex. When we were doing “it” she told me this is how you make babies. At the time I thought “I don’t care, it feels good”.
The next day I started to wonder what it would be like if she had a baby. I had no idea what that meant but started to... (more)

Sexy cousin

I have been in love with my cousin sincere i was a kid .I fantasize having sex with her,we would make out when were younger

Got straightened out

Last week we were putting up small square bales of hay. Dad has this older black guy named Willard as a hired hand. We needed some more help, and hired my 18 year old cousin that lives in town to help. He looks and acts like a girl, but can do a good job of hauling hay when he wants to.
Dad says he's more like a mare around a stud than anything... (more)

A "little" problem.

I've been into my friends mom for a long time. You could probably call it more than a crush.
I jerk off to her pictures, I've masturbated with her dirty panties, mutual flirting, and I've gone as far as take a peep on her changing.
My worry doesn't stem from being caught or her knowing about the things I've done.
In recent times of hanging... (more)

Sluts counting

Hey why can't a slut count to 70....... because 69 is a mouthful

When u look back on it

So my wife never did like the idea of nudism, & hated the thought of swinging,,,,,so she really counted herself out of the fun lol,,,,,I am both, but also a family man. Well I was.
A few years back on holidays in "bore a bore a". It was late, we had been on the piss all nite with my wife's parents & involved in one sided heated government... (more)

Free Pizza!

My sister and I were home alone and really wanted pizza. Problem is we only had $20. She had a plan though and called in the order. When the doorbell rang she ran upstairs into the shower.
I told the guy I was short all the money and he said he couldn't leave me the pizza I asked him if we could have the pizza if I let him see my sister... (more)

O killed the bird

In between classes sophomore year, I would meet my girl at her apartment. She lived alone except for her parakeet. If there was time, we would get busy. This one time she rode on top of me on her couch. I wore this thing called a penis ring that her friend had bought for her. It's hard to describe. Like an accessory to a condom. I didn't think it... (more)

Hope the maid enjoyed the show

In Vegas a few weeks ago, we come back to our room after a day of drinking and gambling and I sit on the couch in the living room area our suite.
My wife comes out of the bathroom in just her CFM stilettos and thong and asks me if I plan on gambling again or would I rather just stay in and "lick her p...."
Pretty sure she was asking me and... (more)

Heh

It's 1 AM, I live in a college town where people are partying all the time and sometimes I overhear some crazy shit. Anyway, just now there was some big verbal fight between some of them, then a big crash, and now there's this drunk bitch crying loudly, more arguing.... God it's so entertaining.

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