Dating and divorce are fucking with everything about my life

I’m a straight, cis woman. My soon-to-be-ex-wife came out as trans and filed for divorce because she didn’t like that I still considered myself straight despite choosing to stay with her. It’s been almost a year and the divorce still isn’t finalized (long, infuriating story).

I had more or less resigned myself to never dating again—trying to stay in a relationship with someone who hates you for loving them will tend to do that—and then someone asked me out. And I said yes. And we had sex,

Only, she’s a woman.

I don’t know what to do. I didn’t fully realize it was a date until she put her arm around my waist. I don’t want to be dating anyone right now. I don’t want to be sleeping with anyone right now. The thought of sleeping with another woman right now makes me feel sick and used.

And of course my ex-to-be found out about it and is screaming at me that this somehow proves I was cheating on her the entire time and how she’s going to take “every red cent” from me in the divorce (it’s a no fault divorce and the only reason it’s delayed is she hasn’t filed her disclosures or showed up to mediation, even though she started the process).

I don’t know. This is not the right place for me to figure any of this out. All I’ve done is made it so there are two pissed off women in my life who feel entitled to sex.

7 days

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    • Try a 3sum with the ex and the new babe!

    • Sounds Ole thr lot of you need some mental health counseling. Thr issue with brint Ttans isn't being Trans, it's wanting to be something you're not. Trans women and men don't just out of the blue decide one day, ya know I'm trans. Most have had gender disforia since adolescence. Your x is a fucking nut job, sounds like #2 is right there with her. Get your mental state sorted before dating again. Good luck

    • You’re a mental train wreck!

    • As far as ex goes she can go flip off. When she hits you with the"cheating" argument push back that she's projecting on you and she is the one that wanted to divorce. Let her know because she's dragging her feet you'll have your attorney lower the boom on her. Have your attorney drive a hard bargain and push this thing through asap . Let you new friend know you've moved too fast for your liking now and that you'll have to bring things down a notch for your own sanity. Then set some boundaries as you move forward. If you're straight then no sense going lesbo so let her know it was a one off and just that. Best thing to do is step back and let things settle before moving on for your own peace of mind.

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