Beastiality, misogyny, raceplay. why did i do this to myself

Turn the clock back 4 years. i just became an rcmp officer, my dream come true. and then,

back in high school i played softball. right after i graduated, i was walking home from getting dinner with some friends when an older man approached me. somehow i wasn't freaked out or anything despite how large and menacing he looked. we got to talking and he admitted that he saw me at some games that my school played at and wanted to know if i was into older men. i was actually into it and a month later we went on our first date. 2 years later and he told me that he'd been holding back on me the whole time. he wanted to do all sorts of things to me and was worried i wouldn't like it. luckily for him i wanted to go further too and we gradually started getting kinkier.

after a month or 2 we didn't get very far but then we agreed to make our relationship officially owner/servant. i loved this, he loved it too. we stayed that way with basically vanilla sex for a while until i admitted to enjoying the degrading and humilating feeling i got when he would call me slut

the next day, he took me to the barber and made me get a short haircut. then he took me to a local store and got me some boy's clothes. instead of good girl he always called me good boy from then on. i'm surprised i haven't had any gender dysphoria because of this but i just haven't

after i clearly was getting wet every time he called me boy he went further and made me the inferior. first it was because i'm a slutty dyke bitch and then it was because i was a just woman at all. finally he added in calling me slurs. we were both white but using slurs just had a kick to them that other words couldn't match. he shaved my head once, and made it his quest to make me his little crossdressing whore.

when i turned 25 he got a puppy. old english sheepdog. sadly, he never got the chance to name him before he got covid and passed early in the pandemic. i named the dog after him.

so for all those years i managed to keep my kink stuff secret. it's all still secret but i'm surprised i did. but then the dog grew, and grew, and grew.

long story short, i'm a doggy slut now. i'm very ashamed of it. i even got a ring to show our relationship.

i hate going home every day and wishing a big black guy would come and rape the shit out of me for being a piece of shit white woman, all the while letting my dog fuck me. it's not ideal.

on a positive note, i've managed to keep it very secretive. on one occasion he tried to fuck me when guests were over and i somehow managed to convince them it was the first time.

i'm pathetic sorry about this

1.1 years ago

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