The lack of sex makes me more depressed

I've had a boyfriend for a year now and he's super sweet! I absolutly adore him, but there is this one thing I just hate... The lack of sex! When we first got into a relationship we had a lot of it, but of course as time went on the sex went less. And I get that, but I mean like "once a month maaybe if I'm lucky" less. He knows I want him, I try to turn him on by dressing sexy, saying I want him, touching the right spots but he just blows it off. And if we do have sex he just lays there saying I can get on top if I feel like it, but not for his pleasure which drives my mood away as well... and if we do finally have sex he never cums.

Now, I personally have a chronical depression and a very low self esteem so this makes me feel so bad about myself, I dont think I am that ugly or bad at sex but he does make me feel like that.
He's had many girls before me and I've had 3 other guys. So I always feel like I'm worse than all the girls he had and not worth it. I also know he masturbates, I work from home and sometimes he's still asleep when I work. And when I take a break I sometimes hear him jerking off and watching porn!
He's still very loving in our relationship so I dont think he doesnt love me anymore. But it's driving me insane! I always felt like my feelings weren't important and now I especially feel that now that he blows of my desires like I'm stupid. It makes me feel so stressed and depressed and I don't want to push him away but I sometimes do this unwanted because I feel so neglected and it sometimes drives me even more suicidal than I am.

I've talked about this with him but he always just laughs it off. And it really really bothers me.

Does it make me a bad girlfriend that it bothers me he watches porn and masturbates while not doing anything with me? And does it make me a bad person that it really bothers he he's had so many girls before me? I knew this when I met him and I dont want to blame him for his past. But it makes me feel bad

4 Comments

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  • Dump that A-hole and find a man who adores and desires you. I've been with over 200 women in my younger years, but my wife of the past 15 years is the only one that matters, and with all of her faults and imperfections is the only one that matters and I make sweet love to her nearly every night. There are lots of good men out there, if your man is not treating you like a sex godess, find one that will.

  • Ok Wilt Chamberlain we believe you.

  • No, it doesn't make you a bad girlfriend. You might want to look for another boyfriend though. I know from experience that the amount of sex you get won't change much.

  • What's his go to porn? Find out what he is into and see if that helps?? Search his internet history, if you can. But most of all communicate and be honest and open with each other and non judgemental!! Good luck

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